Wednesday, January 23, 2008

Hermit crab flies to Jupiter...

I recently found out from two other bloggers that "Saudi Arabia, presented a paper to the UN conference in 1995 saying that there is absolutely nothing in the Quran which directly or indirectly forbids a woman to become the head of a state, or even suggests that she is essentially incompetent for the position"
Wow. Now isn't that wonderful. The Kingdom of Saudi Arabia, Protector of Islam's Holy Places are quite clear on this matter. I thought, these people are not evil after all. We can go ahead and have a female President and Saudi Arabia can have a Queen.
But these mullahs at Adhaalathu party are being a spoilsport telling people that "The Prophet Said Women Should Not Rule The Country". Reading that article I went into a fit of rage and screamed that these misunderstanders of Islam must have attended Harvard or Tel Aviv University. But my friend quietly informed me that these mullahs had been trained at Medina Unversity and Al-Azhar.
Aaargh...those dirty Jews must have infiltrated the highest centers of Islam. Teaching these mullahs to say things that give Islam a bad name.

So I decided to ignore Sura (4:11), Sura (4:176), Sura (2:282), Sura (2:228), Sura (5:6) , Sura (24:31), Sura (4:3), Sura (4:3), Sura (53:27) , Sura (4:24) , Sura (33:52) and Sura (2:223) ( I had to completly ignore the last one because this verse is overtly sexual and there is some dispute as to whether it is referring to the practice of anal intercourse, which it has been used historically to justify (The thought of a Queen of Saudi Arabia, Protector of Islam's Holy Places being taken in this manner by her husband was too frightening to contemplate).
I also ignored a lot more suras and hadiths as none of them specifically forbade a woman to rule a country. They were mostly about how women were deficient in intelligence, they were evil and how a man should beat his wife and stuff like that. Having been ruled over by a narcissitic psychopath for the last 30 years, I am willing to try a woman leader even if women are half-wits and imbeciles. I am sure many Saudis would be willing to be ruled over by a women after all these years of doddering old kings hopped up on sagangooru and Viagra.
Nevertheless I decided to tackle the mundane practicalities of having a Queen of Saudi Arabia. Menstruation. No problem. A Tampax should fix that.
Women are not allowed to drive. Hey - leaders of nations don't drive. They have chaffeurs.
They have to be always accompanied by a male member of the family. Easy..a brother can sit in on the Cabinet meeting..
Can the husband beat the Queen? Hehe..that should be alright as long as it is not on the face..
What if the husband decided to throw the Queen of Saudi Arabia out of the window?
How can we deal with the woman being a merchandise always owned by a man?
All these questions finally sent my brain into overdrive. The arteries and veins tied up in knots and I was left with a question screaming and looping repeatedly in my head. It is a question we used to ask when we were in primary school.
Can you do a shit without expelling a drop of urine?

With that question screaming around my brain I went for a jog around Male' to calm things down. Afterwards I felt better and started to think of other things. We have all heard about how Saddam kept doubles to confuse those who would assasinate him. In this case we don't need body doubles. We just put the Bangladeshi gardener in a hijab.

I am sorry I cannot be more kind about this. Being surrounded by too many people with delusions is taking a heavy toll on me. Now I have seen a hermit crab change its shell into a flying saucer and fly off to Jupiter. Yeah. I did see that. But that was when I was under the influence of LSD.
These people happily trumpeting that "there is absolutely nothing in the Quran which directly or indirectly forbids a woman to become the head of a state, or even suggests that she is essentially incompetent for the position" are suffering from selective amnesia, delusions or taking drugs. Whatever it is, believe you me, it is very much like an acid trip.

5 comments:

  1. Dhivehi Christian4:09 AM

    The Custodians of the Two Holy Sanctuaries and Sheikhs of the House of Al es-Saud must be acting on a very old Dhivehi saying: That women have the right to rule in the same way as Mohanu has ownership of his boat. (Mohanah dhoani dhinun)

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  2. Anonymous10:56 AM

    Can you do a shit without expelling a drop of urine?
    well said
    these muslims like athena etc are crazy and are willing to believe anything

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  3. Anonymous8:00 AM

    you are right..these people have their heads buried in the sands of arabia like ostriches

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  4. MississippiMud5:07 AM

    This is obvious lies, generated by the Zionist media. Where is the proof ? Islam means peace. Jihad means inner struggle. Ok that's enough pretending I'm a muslim. No islam, know peace. :)

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  5. I've been hanging around the muslims too long, sorry lol :)

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