Proof that he died during an explosive moment
Ibn Hisham page 682:
….that he heard Aisha say: “The apostle died on my bosom during my turn: [of having sex with]. It was due to my ignorance and extreme youth that the apostle died in my arms
Sahih Bukhari, Volume 7, Book 62, Number 144:
...during his fatal ailment, Allah's Apostle, used to ask his wives, "Where shall I stay tomorrow? Where shall I stay tomorrow?" He was looking forward to Aisha's turn. So all his wives allowed him to stay where he wished, and he stayed at 'Aisha's house till he died there. He died on the day of my usual turn (of having sex) at my house. Allah took him unto him while his head was between my chest and my neck and his saliva was mixed with my SALIVA.
Aisha is blaming her youth and ignorance for causing Prophet’s death. Aisha’s eager cooperation excited Prophet immensely which lead to a wild session of foreplay and tongue action followed by intensive sex. Due to her inexperience she could not see the danger of an old man performing sex with a young woman during his serious illness. Timely slowing down or stopping him could have saved his life. Prophet had an explosive climax which his old and sick heart could not handle and went in a cardiac arrest. She saw him die and slump on her bosom during his moment of extreme pleasure. (which is not uncommon in such cases). That is why she felt guilty of causing his death...
He did not recite Kalima at death
The hadiths indicate that instead of having kalima on his mouth like a good muslim during his last moments, prophet’s mouth was busy in tongue action and French kissing.
His body must have stiffened as he died during his pleasure moment in an “as is” condition. The fact that they tried to cover him with triple shroud indicates an embarrassing bulge which they must have tried to even out by extra layers of clothing. They wouldn’t have wanted all to know what their prophet was up to when he died.
Dawood, Book 20, Number 3147:
Narrated Abdullah ibn Abbas:
The Apostle of Allah (peace_be_upon_him) was shrouded in three garments made in Najran: two garments and one shirt in which he died.
Apparently the three clothing layers, nor the reported delay in burial, helped the situation and he was buried quietly where he was making love.
25 Apr, 2008
Note: This article may be a satire